“What do you want from me?” The question eeeks out of my brain quicker than I can stop it with better judgement. It’s not a harsh, angry tone—just a sense of exasperation as I sigh and mark an email unread, because I don’t know what to do with it today. I got a card this […]
An Identity Crisis
“I don’t know how to love Jesus without this church.” —her voice came static-y through the marco polo message. And I sat up straighter; tears came to my eyes; she called it more feeling than truth but I felt the truth in it, the truth of it. Because I’ve known it too. I’ve just said […]
Lie Versus Truth: Anxiety
Last week, I wrestled with anxiety. All week long. Day after day it was haunting me, trying to squash hopes and dreams, keeping me distracted and dismayed. Until a friend heard this phrase on repeat, “I am a crazy person!”And she asked me, with a knowing, slightly sly smile, “What does God want you to […]
Disappointment & Discernment
“The emotional pain from the last chapter was also something brewing for a couple of years. But I couldn’t put my finger on it. I didn’t know exactly what I was dealing with. I discerned that something wasn’t right, but discernment doesn’t always give details. Once the truth surfaced, the pain was so intense I […]
Advent: Peace and imperfection.
“I was rounding the corner to the new year in every way. Promise had surfaced in my life. We’d had small circumstantial changes that had translated into fragile hope. But hope was hope. There were no gradations. I hadn’t this sort of quickening of spirit in years.Morning had broken.For a few days, at least…I wrapped […]
waiting & grace.
A year ago today, I wrote the following journal entry. While waiting. While hoping. While anxious. Truth covered my soul then & now, reading it again. Grace fell over my waiting. I hope it does the same for you. ❤️ My schedule is packed this week. My eyes are opening around 7 and struggling to keep […]